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just fucking jenni. [userpic]

(no subject)

June 22nd, 2008 (03:48 pm)

i dont see what is so horribly wrong with me to where no boy wants to take me to a movie, or ask me to a school dance or even take a second look at me


just fucking jenni. [userpic]

(no subject)

April 12th, 2008 (05:32 pm)

i guess every entree on this thing is gonna be about the same person, same topic, but thats ok.

i hatehatehatehatteee how we dont talk anymore. when you promised that we'd never lose touch and you'd try and you would be here for me when i needed to talk.
every phonecall ends in less than five minutes, because "you're busy", "someone is on the other line"
what breaks my heart even more is that i feel less and less apart of your life as the days go by
you dont ever tell me whats wrong anymore..when you used to be able to tell me anything and everything.

the jenni you met that night will come back as soon as she sees the old..well you know.

i miss being vivacious, confident and full of light. i am tired of feeling like shit everyday.

just fucking jenni. [userpic]

(no subject)

March 17th, 2008 (05:19 pm)

this is officially the emo page
i think like 2 people read it
but thats ok because this is where i rant without any consequence

i'm sorry i coudn't accept it and move on the second you ended things
you just caught me at a really bad time
i would tell you all about it
but it's not like you will care
i'm sorry for my horrible temper and pretentious attitude
i'm sorry i've put you through all of it
i'm honest to god trying to be ok without you
but i wasn't ok before you
you made everything good
now it's back i guess?

but what kills is that you made it seem like it wouldn't end for years

we take the good with the bad,if you loved me as much as you said you did (do?) then you would deal with the fucking distance
i did, i delt, i was completely fine with it because it made me appreciate and love you that much more
you said you were willing to do it if i was willing too,so i did but suddenly you cowared out
SO THEN...we established an open relationship,but that wasn't enough

i wish you would shed a tear,and if you have then own up to it
i wish you knew what it was like to hold on to absolutely nothing and not be able to let it go

just fucking jenni. [userpic]

Find a way

September 29th, 2007 (10:49 pm)

Swaying around stage with his black and white guitar
She could see his blonde hair and lanky stature from afar
Years ago she remembered being in this position…
…Watching the band and secretly crushing on the handsome musician
He felt the same, he would sacrifice all of his fame
Just to be with her and feel no absolutely no shame

Love is a splendid but confusing thing from above
Therefore they both resisted because they both knew that this forbidden romance couldn’t have existed
After the last note was hit, her bottom lip is what she nervously bit
Fans swarmed around the autograph table, the anticipation was killing her, she didn’t even seem able

He completely ignored her after the show
It made her feel an all time low
Slowly she walked outside of the small trashy venue to her car where she stood
Desperately she wanted to go back inside, she knew she could
He rushed quickly outside with all his might
He soon saw her silhouette in the light

She looked to him with a single tear in her eye just wishing he would leave her alone and pass by
There were no more words to be spoken because her heart had already been broken
The only thing that remained is the fact that his heart still beat her name
Just like many times in the past her made hers beat so fast

With just one look
She took a step back and shook
For some peculiar reason she was so frightened of what he may say
Her trembling didn’t phase him, he cared more for her than the light of day
He took her into his arms and made everything alright again
Then softly whispered in her ear “…this love has yet to begin”

Yeah dont' hate on my gay poetry haha
Kevin Fyfe texted me at 1 AM asking if i was still up.
Which is 4 AM his time because...he's touring on the east coast.
But still
Fucking random

I got the text at 10 this morning
Sooooo me being me i texted him back and we ended up talking for 2 hours straight via text.........
Wasn't as great as I thought it would be. he kept saying "dump your boyfriend"
I would never though.

I miss andy more and more everyday,
Although this "first love" isn't as glourious as most would hope for it to be, I think this is the greatest feeling I've had in a long time.

just fucking jenni. [userpic]

(no subject)

August 7th, 2007 (02:23 pm)
current song: Whiskey In The Jar- Metallica

Baby, you've got me all wrong.

Keith Buckley 6

just fucking jenni. [userpic]

(no subject)

June 16th, 2007 (01:18 am)
current song: escape the fate

In the past 15 minutes my life pretty much just changed.

I've narrowed my best internet friends down to: veronnica shelby and taylor
Everybody eles are just acquaintances  if they weren't deleted.

I no longer give a fuck about myspace
If anything the internet has just made me seem like a sadistic bitch that never gets her way and talks massive amounts of shit.  However if you'd stick around for the reasoning then you'd think differently. It's your choice though.

I'm heartbroken (sorta) but also liberated. 
I know EXACTLY what I want.  This bad experience has only helped me to realized that.

I've spent too much time on myspace and not enough time with my real friends.

Fuck my internet life, it's not no longer existent.

I've deleted every message in my inbox in my account and all the text messages sent and received.  deleted the number, too.  I know I'll never try and contact you again, and I'm positive you wont do the same either, therefore: no use for numbers.

I'm not going to regret the things I've said, they were awful but it made me realize what's important and what's not.

The internet has made me a petty, bitchy, mean homebody.  I hardly ever party anymore, I only go outdoors when I cheerlead or walk my dog and I eat most of my meals by the computer.
It has only fucked me over.

In fact, I might just delete my myspace and update this thing more often.

just fucking jenni. [userpic]


June 15th, 2007 (09:03 pm)
current location: chair
current song: requiem- the confession

I'll post shit soon :)

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